All in the Mind!

I wanted to write a post about positive thoughts. That’s when my wife told me about this wonderful experience of hers which really touched me and brought out a lot of positivity. So here goes. The entire post is in her own words

I stood beside the water fountain facing the entrance to the huge multi speciality hospital that I was going to be a part of for the next three years. It was my first day as a post graduate student in the field of obstetrics and gynaecology, my subject of interest that I had gladly chosen myself. Yes, I was supposed to deal with women for the rest of my life, and when I say women I mean a whole lot of mood swings, melancholy and ill-temper that accompany them.

They say that the medical profession is a noble profession. I don’t know how noble it feels to deal with cranky pregnant women, irritable women in labour screaming their lungs out and of course not to forget the pensive and grumpy old women with post menopausal problems. How was I going to deal with all these people? Would I be able to live up to my expectations as well as the expectations of my parents who have put their heart and soul to get me into this medical college? Would I be the best among all the rest? Would my life as a doctor be worthwhile? Surrounded by negative vibes, apprehension, skepticism and confusion, my head was spinning round and round. With so many thoughts in my head all I was hoping for was to make the most of my next three years as a trainee in the hospital.

It was my very first day as a doctor on call in the labour ward. As I walked in, my legs froze with fright. I could feel some kind of terror gripping my body, and my forehead was covered with sweat. I was supposed to deliver pregnant ladies who would get admitted into the labour ward all by myself. Yes, definitely I had my seniors coming in to help me out in case I screwed up, but that was not the point. If I had to be the best, I had no opportunity for committing any mistakes.

Suddenly I heard the sound of a bell. “Rrrrrrrrrriiiiinnnng”. That was a sign that a patient was on her way. I was too nervous. With a lot of hesitation I reached out for a glass of water to soothe my extremely dry throat. The doors opened wide and in came a pregnant woman howling and screaming. I almost dropped my glass of water. All that I could hear deep inside me was “I’m all alone in this, I’m all alone in this”. I mustered up all the courage I had and changed into my clean blue scrubs all set to deliver my first patient. The way the woman was howling, it seemed like the baby was ready to come into the world any moment.

I closed my eyes and prayed hard, and all of a sudden. I was filled with all the courage and strength I needed to help me through my tough testing time. What happened in the next one hour, I still don’t seem to fully understand. What kind of superpower seeped into me. “Aaaaaaaaaahhhhh” screamed the woman. “Pussssssshhhhh” I screamed even louder. With the blink of an eyelid, I had a tiny life crying in my hands and I could hear the mother heaving a sigh of relief. I stood there dazed trying to analyze what I had just done and at the same time astonished that I totally had it in me to become a good obstetrician. I felt a chill running down my spine and at the same time a sense of pride brought a big smile on my face.

I saw the woman reaching out to grab my hand, and as I held her soft hands gazing into her tear filled eyes, I heard the most beautiful thing she could ever say to me, the words that every doctor is dying to hear. “Doctor, I can’t thank you enough. You brought my little one into this world safe and sound. I’m so grateful to you”. And she wept, tears of joy rolling down her cheeks. That made all the negative thoughts and doubts I had about myself earlier turn positive. I felt literally on top of the world. It’s rightfully said that this is the noblest of all professions.

AUTHORS NOTE:

1. The above incident is as told by Dr Nishita Fernandes.

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